Uncertain
by BeachBum87
Summary: A lot of things in life are uncertain... Though this story is rated 'T', it will have some 'M' rated material at times. Also, this story contains some moments of enjoyable (and at times adult) humor.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note**: **Yeah, I know what you guys are thinking. But I assure you, taking on three different stories at the same time and having to update all three on a frequent basis will not be a problem—or at least it shouldn't be. I am actually quite proficient when it comes to multi-tasking (just ask anyone in my family). That said, I hope that you guys enjoy this little diddy, and I hope you'll be able to join me in later updates.**

Uncertain…

Chapter One

Its 3:30 in the morning in L.A., and most of the usually bustling city has finally started to quiet down and grow still. Somewhere near the coastline sits a small apartment complex, and within this quaint little village the home of LAPD Detective Marty Deeks can be found. It's not very much and not very big to be honest, but for the shaggy-haired surfer who lives there—it's perfect.

For three months now the little place has been, for the most part, deserted by its owner who left it in a state of mild disarray upon leaving on assignment for the LAPD. The assignment was a deep-cover sting operation designed to finally bring down one of the city's most notorious gang leaders—Roscoe Parker, a.k.a., 'L.A. Slim'. The assignment hadn't been an easy one for the fun-loving, eternally optimistic surfer cop, and given the choice he would very much like to just forget that he was ever involved. Nevertheless, the prodigal son, as they say, has finally returned home at last.

The detective himself stands just outside the complex, duffle bag slung over his shoulder, on the only patch of grass on the property. He can see a familiar white SRX parked in the front lot from where he stands, and he knows its presence here means that Kensi is also here. The thought of seeing her so soon after completing an undercover assignment for LAPD makes him anxious.

Normally after an Op of the magnitude he'd experienced with this latest one, the shaggy-haired detective would spend the following weekend down at the beach, alone, with his surfboard and his thoughts. This would be his time to decompress, and just let the waves wash all of his worries and trepidations away before facing his co-workers at NCIS at the start of the next week. Though he can already sense that this time will be different—in probably more ways than one.

It's no one's fault though. Ever since his partnership with Kensi became an actual 'relationship'—things have been _different_. Most of it has been extremely good, for both of them, but at the same time it's meant that both parties have had to make adjustments in their lives at large. Some of said adjustments were harder to adjust to than others, but then it's only been 7 months next week since they started, and understandably these things do take time. He just hopes he has enough time left to reach that point, at the very least.

* * *

Inside the small apartment Kensi Blye is fast asleep beneath the warmth of a throw blanket on Deek's sofa, while her head rests upon one of the pillows she pulled from his bed. She's been expecting Deeks home soon hence her decision to spend the night here in waiting. Her plan had been to stay up to greet him upon his return, but a long, grinding day at OSP had physically exhausted her to the point that such a plan was no longer viable.

So instead she helplessly drifted off to sleep not long after settling in on the sofa with the intent of watching her favorite movie, _Titanic_, which has long since ended and left the television set blank. The sudden sound of a key turning in the lock on the front door goes unnoticed by the slumbering female federal agent, who does not stir even the slightest bit.

Deeks pushes the door open slowly, and quietly tiptoes inside. He sets his duffle bag down on the floor just to the right of the door, and then carefully refastens both the main lock and the deadbolt. He makes his way forward until he stands at the edge of where two rooms meet—the kitchen and the living area.

His eyes instantly fix upon the woman currently sleeping on his sofa. It's a sight he knows few have ever seen, and the fact that he is one of those few makes his heart swell in his chest. He can't help the faint smile that tugs at the edges of his mouth as he stands there watching her sleep so peacefully.

He effortlessly works his way out of his tennis shoes using only one hand, and then leaves them setting there in the middle of the floor as he tiptoes towards the sofa (and Kensi). Along the way he picks up the tv remote from off the floor where it had fallen to at some earlier point, and after using it to turn off the television-he sets it down on the nearby coffee table.

He finally lowers himself into a sitting position between the coffee table and the sofa. He's just too tired at this point to make it too the bedroom, so this will just have to do for the night.

Now Kensi stirs.

"You're home." She murmurs quietly, without opening her eyes.

"Shhh, go back to sleep baby." Deeks whispers softly. He had been trying not to wake her, but as luck would have it that's just what he's wound up doing—or so he thinks.

"How…was your trip?" she asks, still murmuring and pausing for only a second, mid-sentence, for an unexpected yawn.

"It was good." He whispers, as he rubs the bridge of his nose. "Now please…go back to sleep." He adds. His voice rises slightly with unexpected exasperation, and he finds himself immediately hoping she didn't notice the change in pitch.

"Okay." She says with a yawn, as she slowly turns her body away from him. "I'm glad you're home safe." She murmurs just as she finally drifts back off to dreamland once more.

"Me too." Deeks whispers, with a sigh as he leans back against the sofa.

Within minutes sleep claims the exhausted Detective, and he makes no effort at all to resist it. His thoughts just before succumbing to the numbness of sleep, are of the news he knows he'll have to share with Kensi at some point in the near future. He just wishes that he didn't have to, and he knows it'll break her heart when he does tell her though.

* * *

Deeks awakens early to the sound of birds chirping outside the living room window. He can still hear the soft, steady breathing of the slumbering beauty on the sofa behind him. _Good, she's still asleep. _He rubs the sleep from his eyes, and lets out a long yawn at the same time. The display on his wristwatch, when he looks down, shows that the time is just 20 minutes after 7.

He pulls himself to his feet quietly, and makes his way across the floor towards the bedroom. That's where his favorite trunks and surfboard are stashed, and he desperately needs some time on the waves after his unexpected three-month hiatus from his favorite pastime. He figures he can ride a few waves, and still be back before Kensi wakes up. Then maybe the two of them can have breakfast together afterwards.

"Hey," a soft voice says from behind the shaggy-haired man.

Deeks pauses at the door to the bedroom, and looks over his shoulder at the woman on the sofa. "Didn't mean to wake you." He tells her in a quiet voice.

"It's fine." She replies, as she sits up and stretches her arms high over her head. "Were you going somewhere?" she asks, curiously.

Deeks runs a hand through his hair as he turns around to face her. "Just out. Thought I catch a few waves before breakfast."

"Give me a sec to get ready, and I'll go with you." She says as she shrugs away the blanket that had covered and kept her warm through the previous night. She pulls herself up, and begins to fold the blanket up neatly.

This is what he had been trying to avoid. He really wanted to just be alone for a couple of hours to do his thing, but now Kensi's awake and she wants to accompany him to the beach. It's a serious wrench in his plan.

"Kens." He starts, his intention being to rectify what he sees as a problem. Then she turns and looks at him expectantly with her hair hanging lose around her face, and those gorgeous mismatched eyes he can't help but love. With a sigh he changes his mind.

"Something wrong?" she asks, worry lines etching their way across her face. She steps around the coffee table and moves towards him. She's wearing one of his t-shirts over a pair of panties, and nothing more. It's actually quite sexy.

He shakes his head at her. "Nothing, it's just…Ya know what, I can go anytime. What do you say we just get some breakfast?" He tells her.

Kensi steps up close and wraps her arms around him, remembering what it feels like to be this close to the man she loves with all of her heart. She looks up into his face searching for what, she doesn't know. She does know, however, that something's clearly bothering him, and he obviously doesn't want to talk about it.

"You sure?" she asks. "I don't mind going. Unless, you don't want me too." She says, sounding a little dejected at the thought of her lover not wanting her around.

Deeks can see that his uneasiness is starting to upset her a little bit, and the last thing he ever wants is to hurt her feelings. He loves her too much to risk something like that. He quickly takes her hand up into his own, and raises them to his lips. There he plants a gentle kiss against the knuckles of one hand.

"Baby, there is no place I'd rather be than with you." He tells her reassuringly, and meaning every word.

She smiles and nods. "I missed you." She says as she presses herself into his warmth. Whatever it is that he's hiding from her-she won't push it. She'll wait until he is good and ready to talk, and then she'll be there for him.

"I missed you too." He replies, kissing her forehead gently. He closes his eyes briefly, and takes in her sweet, fragrant scent as if for the last time ever in his entire life. He wants to remember it, to remember her, just like this.

"Come on." She says, pulling away from her lover with a smile. She takes his hands in her own, and begins to lead him the rest of the way into the bedroom. The confused look she sees painted across his face makes her giggle softly.

* * *

"Where are we going?" Deeks asks, not quite understanding what she's doing as they enter the master bedroom.

Kensi laughs. "To get you into something more appropriate for the beach." She tells him, as if it should have been all too obvious.

"The beach?" he questions, raising a brow in her direction.

"Yes. The beach." She says, finally letting go of his hands. "You need to surf. I'm sure you haven't had a good session in a while, and you look like you could use one."

He nods. _She knows me so well_. He can't help but stare in complete wonder and awe at the tanned beauty. She never ceases to amaze him, and usually in the most wonderful ways—or at least to him it seems as such.

Kensi leaves him for only a second as she quickly disappears into the master bathroom, and then returns just as quickly with the pair of trunks she knows to be his very favorite in the whole world. "Here, change into these." She says, tossing him the trunks. Then she turns her attention to the dresser on the far side of the room. The dresser has 6 drawers in it, and one of those is hers. It is packed with the things that she would normally need in case of an overnight stay with her man—which actually does happen quite a bit.

Deeks looks down at the pair of trunks in his hands, and then looks up at Kensi with a confused grin spread across his face. If he's going to go surfing, then he doesn't need his trunks—what he needs is his wetsuit and nothing more.

"Baby, what I need is my wetsuit." He tells her, trying not to laugh because he knows that she's really trying. And he would hate to squash her enthusiasm over something as trivial and unimportant as this.

Kensi turns to face him, as she pulls her nightshirt up over her head revealing her chest to the shaggy-haired man. Behind her the one drawer is setting open.

To his surprise Kensi is not wearing a bra under the nightshirt she'd slept in. Instead, her perfect, supple breasts are now hanging free and without care for all too see. Good thing it's just the two of them right now.

"What were you saying about your wetsuit?" she asks, unaware of the effect her exposed chest is having on the shaggy-haired surfer. Though it isn't like he's never seen her naked before.

Deeks doesn't seem to be paying any attention to her words at this point though. His eyes are trained longingly on her chest area and the look on his face is the same as one might expect to find on a person who's been put under a trance.

A slightly concerned look crosses Kensi's face as she stares back at Deeks. "You okay?" she asks, waving a hand in the air in front of him. "You were saying something about your wetsuit, remember?"

Still no response from the Detective though, and confused by his lack of attention she carefully follows his gaze downward to its endpoint. "Deeks, something wrong? What are you looking-" She begins to laugh as soon as she realizes he's been staring at her breasts._ An opportunity for some fun_.

Kensi gives her upper body a little wiggle, and watches with amusement as his eyes appear to follow the movement of her breasts as they bounce gently against her chest. She stifles another laugh, and forces herself to continue the act. "You like what you see, surfer boy?" she teases, mimicking a stripper she'd once met while undercover on an assignment a couple of years back.

Deeks nods, almost drooling at this point. He'd nearly forgotten, during his three months away, just how beautiful his girl is. He is aware of the steadily growing heat in the crotch of his pants, but this doesn't seem to have any effect on the trance-like state he's fallen into.

Kensi playfully pushes her breasts together, and can almost hear Deeks salivating from across the room. "They're so soft…you wanna touch?" she continues her tease, enjoying every second of it.

"Uh hunh." Deeks mumbles, with what must be assumed can only be some sort of nod. Suddenly the heat gives way to the sensation of tightening in the crotch of his pants, and this instantly snaps him out of his trance. "I mean…um, err, wha-what were we talking about—just now." He stammers, his face flushing with deep color as he struggles to regain his composure while trying to hide the bulge in his pants.

Kensi can't help but laugh at the shaggy-haired man. His bulge is clearly visible despite his best efforts to cover it up. "You _did _miss me." She exclaims humorously.

Deeks shakes his head out of slight embarrassment. "This is not something you want to have while wearing a wetsuit." He remarks dryly, referring to his bulge.

"What's the matter with you?" she asks, still laughing to herself. "Its not like you haven't seen me naked before—on multiple occasions."

"I…guess it's just been a while." He admits sheepishly. "I'd forgotten how beautiful you are." He adds, his voice soft and earnest.

Kensi blushes a little bit at Deeks' observation, but turns back to the drawer and picks out a cute bikini top and then it's matching bottom. While she dresses herself in the sexy swimwear she's picked out, the sound of Deeks moving around behind her is clearly audible.

Deeks disappears into the master bathroom in search of the wetsuit he's sure he left in there, along with his trunks, before he left three months earlier. "Ah ha. Here it is." He exclaims from within the bathroom.

Kensi finishes tying off her bikini top, and shortly after begins the transition from panties to the matching bikini bottom. "So, do you not wear the trunks underneath the wetsuit?" Kensi asks, loudly, so he can hear her from inside the bathroom.

"Nope." He calls back.

"Then what do you wear underneath?" she asks curiously, as she pulls the bikini bottoms up past her knees.

"Not a thing." Deeks calls back. "I mean theoretically you could wear something underneath, ya know to prevent chaffing I guess. But me, I like the freedom."

Kensi laughs at that. She is now fully dressed in her swimsuit, but now she needs to throw something on over it for the ride to the beach in case they stop somewhere on the way.

"We're alike that way." He jokes.

Kensi rolls her eyes, though she knows he can't see her doing it. She knows exactly what he's referring to as well—the whole no bra thing from earlier. "Okay, that's different." She tells him, as she quickly pulls on a pair of short shorts, and a tank top. "I would never sleep in a bra—in fact no woman does." She adds.

Deeks finally exits the bathroom dressed in his wetsuit, and a smile that stretches from ear to ear. "So its not just when you're here—its all the time?" he remarks with a smirk.

"Well, I do enjoy it more when I'm here." She teases back. Her eyes seem to drift southward a little bit, and she feigns a look of disappointment at what she finds. "I see your issue seems to have…resolved itself." She points out, with a playful huff.

"Don't worry princess," he says, stepping towards the brunette beauty. "I'm sure it'll be back—you know how these things are." He teases her.

"You promise?" she whispers in his ear as he pulls her closer for a kiss.

"Oh, with certainty." He replies.

Kensi lets out an uncharacteristically girly giggle. "I'll hold you to it." She tells him, between kisses. "Right now, however, there is a wave out there with your name on it."

"Well then what are we waiting for?" he asks, motioning with his arm towards the door.

Kensi is so glad to see the light back in his face and eyes. It looks better on him than the look of uncertainty he'd been wearing earlier, and even though she realizes its only a temporary bandage until he finally decides to let her in on whatever was bothering him before—she'll take it.

…TBC…


	2. Chapter 2 (Includes M rated material)

**Author's Note: Okay, so one quick warning about this chapter—it has some serious 'M' rated material in it, and also it is basically 'fluff'. In the next chapter, however, the truth comes out, and Deeks will have to confront Kensi with his 'news'…how will she take it? Check in for regular updates, and find out for yourselves. Don't forget to review/comment. Enjoy **

Uncertain…

Chapter 2

Deeks straddles his surfboard, which bobs aimlessly up and down with the surf. He keeps his eyes trained on the horizon in search of the next good wave. This is the point where patience is absolutely everything. It is a hard lesson, but one of the first any new surfer learns. Still, when you're as tense as Deeks is, being patient is no easy feat.

Other surfers around him are having fun just jumping the smaller waves, but not Deeks. The shaggy-haired surfer cop, as Kensi had once called him, wants more than what the smaller waves can offer. He wants that one wave he knows he can just lose himself in, and forget all about the worries and fears he carries around.

That's when he feels it. _This is it—The one._ He stretches himself out flat against his board, and begins pulling himself through the water with even, fluid motions.

On the beach Kensi watches from her perch in the sand as Deeks paddles further out over the water on his board. The sea beneath him slowly begins to rise, and before long he's pulling himself up to his feet, carefully balancing himself for the ride to follow. A feeling of pride brings the brunette beauty to her feet cheering for her _surfer guy_ as she watches him expertly navigating the wave. Beside her, a certain shaggy-haired dog, whom they had picked up from Deeks' neighbor before coming to the beach, sits wagging his tail and barking excitedly. Apparently 'man's best friend' recognizes his master's surfing style, even amongst all of the other surfers' present in the water.

Deeks leans his body left and right ever so slightly when necessary, and manages to prolong his ride to the point of inducing a state of sheer ecstasy. But just as quickly as it had started, the wave begins to gradually die out beneath him. Finally, Deeks has to bail on his perfect wave, and so he dives to the side headfirst letting the remnants of his wave pass over him.

It seems to Kensi like forever since she watched Deeks bail into the water, and she's still waiting to see him reappear. After another minute or so his head finally breaks the surface of the water, and he immediately reaches out for his board. The sight of her lover safe and sound makes Kensi leap for joy.

"Come on boy." Kensi calls to Monty as she trots down to the water's edge to meet her lover as he wades ashore. She stands with her toes barely in the ocean while Monty remains just out of the water's reach.

Deeks shakes the excess water from his hair as he makes his way ashore. His mind is at ease now, or at least more so than it had been before, and for a while he actually feels like his old self again. He pumps his fist in the air triumphantly for all to see, and then lets out a joyous cheer.

"Woo Hoo, Yeah!"

Kensi greets her lover with a smile when he finally reaches the point where the ocean meets the shoreline. "You looked good out there." She tells him, as she stands on her tiptoes to steal a kiss. But Deeks has other plans.

He hooks his free arm around Kensi's waist, and pulls her in close. His lips seize hers in a passionate kiss that seems to last forever. When they finally do break for air though, Kensi looks up into those Pacific Ocean blue eyes that she can never quite get enough of. She can still see the slightest glimmer of his former anxiety, but for the most part he seems to be at peace—at least for the moment.

"How do you feel?" she asks tentatively.

"Hmm, like a million bucks princess." He replies with a grin.

Kensi chuckles. "You feeling hungry yet?" she asks next, leading him away from the surf.

"Oh, starving is more like it." He admits, just now beginning to feel the hunger pangs that accompany the rumbling in his stomach. "In fact, I kind of feel like pancakes for some reason." He adds.

Kensi thinks for a moment. "Oh, there's an IHOP just four blocks away from here." She says, recalling the location of the restaurant she'd seen in passing only a few days before.

"Perfect." He exclaims, already licking his lips in anticipation of what he knows will be an intensely satisfying breakfast. "Of course…we'll have to run by my place, and get cleaned up first. I didn't really bring anything to change into. And we need to drop off Monty too—I doubt they'll let him eat breakfast with us."

Kensi nods. "Then we'll just have to save some scraps for poor Monty, won't we." Kensi says, holding her hand out for the shaggy dog to lick happily.

"Of course." Deeks replies, with a wink at his loyal dog. "Monty and me are best buds, right boy? We share everything."

* * *

At Deeks' place the couple carefully strip out of their swim suits. Kensi lets her clothing fall haphazardly to the floor in the bathroom, while Deeks makes the effort to hang up his wetsuit to dry very neatly elsewhere.

Kensi already has the shower running nice and warm. She steps inside first, and then Deeks enters behind her a few seconds later. Kensi lets the warm water flow over her body washing away all traces of the beach. Then she reaches for the bottle of lavender scented body wash setting on the rack mounted directly into the shower wall underneath the shower head.

Deeks helps by rubbing the soapy lather over her back and shoulders, while she takes care of her front. Then she rinses herself off beneath the steady stream of warm water, and in doing this just happens to catch sight of Deeks running a bar of Irish Spring soap over his lightly tanned skin. The way the soap clings to his muscular frame only to be washed away by the flow of water from the showerhead seems to mesmerize the female federal agent. At this point Deeks has no idea the brunette beauty is watching him.

As she watches him rinsing off, she feels a simmering heat begin to pool low in her belly. That all too familiar feeling of butterflies follows soon after, and before she knows it—she's standing with only inches between herself and Deeks. She splays her hands out against his muscular chest and nervously swallows a lump in her throat. She's feeling very turned on at this point.

"Kens?" Deeks says her name questioningly, as he looks down into her mismatched eyes.

Kensi raises a finger to his lips to silence him, as she begins running her hands carefully down his rugged musculature heading southward. The whole way she traces a line of gentle kisses down his chest, over his chiseled abs, and eventually reaches the part of his anatomy she is most interested in.

Deeks closes his eyes, tilting his head back slightly, as Kensi playfully teases him. "Oh, Fern." He groans in a quiet voice.

Kensi finally stops working him with her hand, having fully aroused him at this point, and moves on to something she knows he'll find a little more _satisfying_. She flicks the tip with her tongue, and playfully nips at it all around as a steady stream of warm water flows over them from the showerhead.

She raises her eyes to him, a mischievous look painted across her face, and is quite pleased with herself as she notices how the muscles in his face and neck are all tensed in response to her playfulness. She then turns her attention back to her previous work. She places several gentle kisses around his tip before finally taking him completely into her mouth.

"Aaah…Mmmm…Oh, Geez, baby—that feels good." He groans out in a thick, husky voice as Kensi continues to pleasure him. He tangles one hand in her long, dark locks and seems to hold her in place right where she's at.

"Mmmmm…Oh, Aaaah…Yeah, that's my girl." He groans out, as Kensi begins to increase her pace. He knows he won't last much longer like this, and if he wants any chance at sharing his already imminent release with her—he'll have to stop her quickly.

"Kens?" he tries, barely able to manage much more than a strangled whisper. "Kens…stop." He tries again, but to no avail. He finally realizes he'll have to take action.

A pair of hands suddenly wraps themselves around her waist, and she instantly feels herself being pulled away from her delicate work. A desperate whimper escapes her throat as Deeks pulls her up towards him, and an audible popping sound is heard as her lips finally part with his sex.

"Why did you stop me!?" she demands in a low, angry voice.

Deeks shakes his head at her, eyes closed, as he struggles to regain his former composure. "N-Not here." He tells her in a throaty whisper. He reaches out with one hand, and shuts off the shower. Next, he grabs two towels off of the rack just outside the shower. He hands one to Kensi, and keeps one for himself.

* * *

Deeks enters the master bedroom carrying Kensi in his arms. He tosses her gently onto the bed where she lands on her bottom with a plop. She supports herself on her hands, and stares back at the shaggy-haired man standing naked near the end of the bed. Her heart hammers excitedly in her chest, and her dilated pupils betray the wanton desire she feels inside. The simmering heat from before has now morphed into a full-blown fire, and there is only one thing that can quench it.

Deeks pulls himself up onto the bed, and crawls towards the naked beauty. He leans in close and presses his lips to hers in a deep, passionate kiss—claiming her with his tongue. She returns the favor with equal fervor.

Its hard to believe that it's been nearly three months since the last time the two of them were together like this, but it seems to all come back so naturally.

"You are so beautiful." He whispers, awestruck once again by the sight of her. His eyes seem to explore her almost as if for the very first time. He begins to trace a line of tender kisses down the side of her neck, starting just behind her ear. As he does this, his hands begin to roam over her shoulders and arms eventually moving to her chest, and the supple breasts that await him there. He gives both breasts a gentle squeeze in his hands, and listens to the soft murmur that escapes her lips.

"Deeks…"

Next, he pulls away and lowers his head to suckle her tender nipples—first one, and then the other. Her soft whimpers only drive him onward, and add to his own desire as he continues his playful teasing. "Oh…yes." She whimpers, as Deeks suckles and nips playfully at her breasts. The care he takes with each and every movement is breathtaking, and each is meant to bring her maximum pleasure as he slowly makes his way towards her 'sweet spot'.

Deeks finally dips his head down between her legs, gripping her thighs, and finds her hot and ready for him. This arouses him further. He then begins flicking his tongue in and out of her tender, wet folds at a rapid pace.

Kensi gasps and arches her back at the sensations that ripple through her body as Deeks works her with his tongue. "Oh…shit." She moans aloud, biting down on her lower lip to try and contain the sounds escaping from within her. The brunette beauty raises one arm, and tangles her hand in Deeks' golden locks.

"Aaaah…Aaaaah….Mmmmm…Deeks, oh please. Please." She moans, with a pleading tone to her voice, as she arches against him once more. "Shit."

Finally Deeks lifts his head, and sucks in a huge breath of air. Then a grin spreads across his face, as he looks his girl over. "Say it." he breathes.

Kensi is shaking all over at this point, and her entire body is screaming, desperate for release. She swallows a hard lump in her throat as Deeks rises up to loom over her. He wraps his arms around her back, and gently lowers her to the bed. He then presses his lips against hers in another deep, passionate kiss.

"Say it." He presses her once more.

Kensi gathers her nerves, and whispers against her lover's lips. "Please…I need you so bad inside."

Deeks plants a gentle kiss against Kensi's forehead, as he tries to pull himself up. He knows how insistent she usually is about using protection whenever they make love together, so he figures he should probably stick to that arrangement.

"Just let me get us some-" he starts to say, but Kensi quickly pulls the shaggy-haired man back down to her.

"Not this time." She breathes against his lips, as she steals a quick kiss.

Deeks grins in amusement at the tan-skinned beauty lying beneath him. He nudges her center with his knee, and she spreads her legs to allow him entrance into her. They both take in a sharp breath as they're bodies finally connect—it is only now that they realize just how close they are to the edge.

Kensi has always loved how perfectly they seem to fit together, and she's always felt it a sign of how they are meant to be together. She wraps her legs around his waist, as she waits for her body to fully adjust to Deeks being inside her.

After allowing a few seconds for Kensi's body to adjust to his size—he begins to move. He starts out slowly at first, but then gradually increases their tempo.

* * *

"Oh…Ooh….Deeks, I'm gonna-Oh, shit. Aaah." Kensi pants, digging her finely manicured nails into the flesh of his shoulders. Intense waves of pleasure suddenly ripple through her body in an explosion of sheer ecstasy in the wake of her release.

Deeks hammers home with one last, powerful thrust, and then he finally finds his own release. "Aah, Kens—Ugh, Ooh." He breathes sharply, as he struggles to keep his balance while his body spasms uncontrollably from his release. After a minute or so, Deeks bends his head down to hers, and takes her lips in a single, unmatchable kiss of pure passion.

They're eyes meet for the longest time, as they lay still tangled in one another's arms. Everything that they are currently thinking passes between them in that one look, but even so Deeks still feels compelled to vocalize what he's feeling deep in his heart.

"I love you." He says softly, looking into her mismatched eyes.

Kensi smiles up at her lover, and raises a hand to his scruffy cheek. "I love you more." She replies, in the same soft tone.

Suddenly Deeks' stomach lets out a loud growl, as he and Kensi have yet to eat breakfast at this point. He and Kensi both laugh at the sound, and it isn't long before her stomach begins to do the same thing.

"Guess we should see about that breakfast now, hunh?" he says, with a smile.

"Probably wouldn't hurt." She replies, with a grin.

* * *

Deeks walks into the bathroom, still naked, several minutes later as Kensi climbs back into the shower to wash off once again. He reaches for the medicine cabinet just above the sink, and pulls open the door. Inside he fumbles around a bit until he finally locates a bottle of extra-strength aspirin.

He can already feel one of his 'headaches' coming on. He hopes that with a few aspirins he'll be able to manage his condition while he's around Kensi—at least until he figures out how best to tell her.

He pops the top off of the bottle, and pours out three of the little white tablets into the palm of his hand. Then he tosses the pills into his mouth, and giving his head a slight tilt backwards—swallows all three at once.

He replaces the bottle in the cabinet, and closes the door back. He leans forward against the sink, and seems to sink into a state of deep thoughtfulness. _If this was our last chance to be intimate together…I hope it was enough._

…TBC…


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note: Okay, so, thanks again for joining me for more of this little love story that I'm spinning like a spider's web, and I just want to clear the air for those of you who have expressed some concern…I assure you guys, this is not a 'death story' at all. It is a love story through and through.**

Uncertain…

Chapter 3

It's been a long, hard two days at NCIS, not just for Deeks, but also for the whole team. Two ex-marines had engaged in a three-day bank-robbing spree that seemed to take them all over L.A. As a result NCIS had been forced to work very closely with the LAPD—something Deeks would not wish on anybody.

The whole case was just one ordeal after another—from start to finish. Both sides constantly competed for the lead on the case, and most of the time with disastrous results. In the end though NCIS and LAPD had to join forces in order to successfully bring down the terrible duo once and for all.

Still, everyone seems to be doing quite well, despite the last two days feeling like complete hell. Callen and Sam sit behind their desks in the bullpen finishing some paper work on the case they just closed, and at the same time somehow able to joke around with each other, as is their custom. Kensi had been the first to finish her paperwork, as always, and had gone out to the gym for a quick workout session.

Deeks, however, stands alone in the men's restroom. His mind races over the events of the day and the one before it in silence, as he braces himself against the sink staring helplessly into the single mirror mounted over it. Sure the three months before had been miserable for the seasoned detective, but this last case with NCIS was a real eye-opener. He finally sees just how bad off he really is in his current condition—something he has tried desperately to avoid to this point.

* * *

Deeks groans aloud as the familiar sensation of unnaturally intense pressure begins to slowly build somewhere in his head. He squeezes his eyes shut, and tries to will the pain away at first. As always though he ends up snatching the bottle off the edge of the sink, and after unscrewing the lid measures out three of the tiny pills into the palm of his hand. He downs the meds in a quick gulp, tilting his head back slightly, and then replaces the bottle in its former position.

_I have to tell her._ _She deserves the truth after all. Even if it means hurting her._

Deeks lets his mind quietly wander back to that day approximately a month and a half ago. This was the day he finally broke from his cover, for only a couple of hours, in order to meet with a doctor at a local hospital about the frequently recurring migraines he was having.

_Deeks sits alone in a small, drab looking room. The colors on the wall make the seasoned Detective think of snot and puke. These are definitely not colors that he would have chosen for such a venue._

_He is hoping that when the doctor finally reappears in his room it will be with good news. Like, maybe there's a reason for his intense headaches that can be easily cured. It's hard to do the job he does, after all, when constantly worrying about when or where another episode might creep up on him._

_The sound of the door opening at last attracts the attention of the shaggy-haired man, and he immediately raises his eyes to the man entering the room. Doctor Marshall Pratt is a thin, middle-aged man with thinning white hair, and a light patch of same-colored scruff on his chin._

_The doctor closes the door effectively affording the two men the privacy required for such business as theirs. He shifts his wire-framed glasses back up on his nose, and appears slightly uneasy as he looks over the haggard-looking Detective._

"_So, Doc…any good news?" Deeks asks, unable to completely suppress the growing anxiety he feels inside._

_The doctor inhales and then exhales a tell-tale breath, and then finally walks towards Deeks. "I'm sorry, I wish I had better news for you, but I'm afraid what I have is quite the opposite."_

_Deeks feels his heart sink in his chest at the doctor's words. "What do you mean, exactly?" the detective asks._

The liaison officer barely has control of his body now, as it seems to shake entirely of its own volition. A single tear rolls down from the corner of his eye, and then disappears within the forest of light-colored scuff. After a few minutes though, he manages to pull himself together just enough to decide that it might be best to tell Hetty first.

* * *

Hetty looks up from her afternoon tea, and finds the shaggy-haired liaison officer standing at the edge of her office. She sets her cup down on the desktop quietly, and motions for Deeks to take a seat. She can see the worry and fear in his normally bright, Pacific Ocean blue eyes.

"Mr. Deeks."

"Hey Hetty, sorry to bother you like this." Deeks apologizes as he settles himself into the seat in front of the operations managers' desk.

"No bother at all, Mr. Deeks." She assures him. "What can I do for you?"

"This isn't easy to say." He tells her. "There's just so much uncertainty attached that I…" he swallows a hard lump as fresh tears spring to the corners of his eyes. "…I mean, I haven't even told Kensi yet." He sniffles.

Hetty looks deeply into the younger man's eyes, and there she sees an overwhelming amount of fear and sadness. Whatever it is that's weighing on him at present is certainly a big deal—that much is perfectly clear to the tiny woman.

Deeks inhales a deep breath, and then lets it out trying to steady himself before continuing once again. "I've been having these 'migraines'…real bad 'migraines' for the last few months." He begins. "About a month and a half ago, I finally went to see a doctor…"

* * *

Kensi exits the gymnasium, and strolls into the main lobby area of the mission. She finished her workout several minutes before, and then took the time to clean up in the showers. She looks around the room, and sees Sam and Callen still in the bullpen. She does not, however, see Deeks anywhere.

"You guys seen Deeks?" She asks her teammates, sticking her head into the bullpen.

Callen looks up at Kensi. "Yeah, a few minutes ago. I think he was going to see Hetty." He says, nodding in the direction of the tiny woman's office.

"Okay, thanks."

The female federal agent decides to take a seat at her own desk, and wait patiently for Deeks to finish his business with their boss. She has been hoping all day long that tonight will be the night that he finally opens up to her. Deeks hasn't quite been the same since his return from the undercover assignment, and Kensi can't help but feel curious and apprehensive about the reason.

Several minutes pass by in silence for the brunette beauty, and during that time she manages to pack up all of her things to head home. Just then a cell phone rings nearby. Kensi looks up, and sees that Deeks left his cell phone sitting on his desktop, and now apparently he's receiving a phone call.

"I'll get it." She tells the others as she reaches for the phone.

"Sure that's a good idea?" Sam asks.

"Relax." She tells the muscular ex-Navy Seal. "He trusts me."

She holds the phone close, and reads off the Caller ID. The name on the display reads Dr. Martin Trask. Not a name that Kensi is particularly familiar with, but she does think too much into it—at least not at first. She hits the answer button and holds it to her ear. "Hello?"

An automated message begins to play from the other end of the line.

"_Hello. This is just a reminder about your appointment with us tomorrow at Primary Health Associates, L.A. Branch. Our records show that you are scheduled for a consultation with Dr. Martin Trask at 10:30 a.m. tomorrow morning. If this information is incorrect, please contact us at the following number and let us know so that the problem may be resolved in an expedient manner. Thank you again for choosing Primary Health Associates—'Working towards a better You'."_

Kensi doesn't wait for the callback number to play out. Instead, she closes the phone and holds it in her hands for a long moment. A sudden, uneasy feeling settles over her as she sits behind her desk. Her gut tells her that the phone call is somehow related to the thing that's been bothering Deeks.

An idea pops into her head, and following the light bulb moment she lays the phone down and pulls herself to her feet.

* * *

Kensi walks quickly into the Ops Centre just a minute or so later. She finds Eric and Nell chatting with one another at their terminals. Both seem to be relaxed, and enjoying the down time now that the latest case has been closed.

She clears her throat to get their attention.

Uh, yes. Kensi, can we help you?" Nell asks, turning to face the beautiful female federal agent.

"Can you guys look up something for me, real quick?" Kensi asks.

"Sure." Eric replies. "What is it?"

"Dr. Martin Trask." She repeats the name she'd read off of the phone's Caller ID.

Within mere seconds the two tech analysts find a plethora of information on the well-respected medical professional. "It says here that Dr. Trask specializes in Oncology, and is currently employed here in L.A. at-"

"Primary Health Associates." Kensi finishes for the tech analyst in a sad voice.

Nell picks up on the drastic change in Kensi's tone, and immediately turns back to face her friend. "Is everything okay, Kensi?" the tech analyst asks softly.

"I-I don't know." Kensi replies, shaking her head. She knows full well what that title means, and in her mind it's not a good thing—especially not considering when she knows her boyfriend has an appointment with this doctor. "I-I have to go. Just clear the search, and forget I ever said anything to you guys. Okay?"

She does not leave the pair any time to reply, as she turns and quickly exits the Ops Centre. She decides, as she makes her way down the staircase, that she still won't push the subject with Deeks tonight—she'll be patient, just as before. He'll talk when he's good and ready to.

* * *

She reaches the bottom of the stairs, and out of the corner of her eye she see Deeks standing near his desk in the bullpen. Her heart pounds intensely inside her chest as she rounds the corner with a million different scenarios playing out in her head. As she approaches the bullpen their eyes meet, and its all she can do to keep from demanding an explanation right there in front of everyone else.

"Hey," Deeks says, as Kensi walks into the bullpen. "You ready to head out?"

She only nods. It's all she can do at this point, and if she tries to speak now she knows she'll only be putting him on the spot. Instead, she quietly gathers her things from her desk as Deeks waits patiently.

* * *

The ride from OSP to his place takes forever, or at least it seems that way in Kensi's mind, and the awkward silence between the couple only intensifies this feeling. It seems like every time she chances a look in Deeks' direction she finds herself feeling even worse than before.

He parks in the lot just outside his apartment, and there he and Kensi sit in uncomfortable silence for what seems like the longest time. Neither one really willing to look at each other, and both knowing, somehow, that this will not be an ordinary night for them.

_This is ridiculous. She knows me better than anyone else, and there is no way on Earth I can possibly hide this from her…she's not stupid after all. She will find out eventually, whether from me, or someone else all together._

He resolves himself at last to tell his girl the truth, but the parking lot outside his apartment is not the place he wants to do it. He replaces the key into the ignition slot, and restarts the car. This seems to startle the silent brunette beside him, and she immediately turns her face towards his.

"What?" she questions in a quiet voice. "Where are we-?"

He clears his throat before speaking. "Kens, we need to talk…but not here, okay." He says softly. "I just need you to humor me, please?"

Kensi nods. Her heart is breaking in her chest for him right now. She has an idea of what it is that he wants to talk about, and she can't help but feel as though it's going to be something she really doesn't want to hear.

"Whatever you need." She replies sweetly, bringing her hand to rest on top of his as it grips the steering wheel.

…TBC…


End file.
